Travelling 24 hours without a phone after drunkenly losing it in a taxi on the last night of holiday in Shanghai

I am King Universe, ordained and crowned; 

Here Time She lies still and Space He is bound; 

Breathing is easy for those who are drowned;

Where the Beating Drum is the only sound,

How it feels to be a phone

By a phone

An attempt shall now unfold to tell the tale of our Universe, 

Through rhyme and through verse to the origins we’ll traverse,

But first we must introduce each hero and their curse,

So lo and Behold The Man, who we shall meet first.

“Incoming call from an unknown number” ,

Hearing these words, Ralph awoke from his slumber.

Another post-lunch snooze with a belly full of booze, 

And a head with an ache and a mind now awake,

He mumbled expletives from his large lonely bed,

When A.I.da spoke again from the chip in his head...